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This List of School Puns is in a Class by Itself

Most schools don’t offer any coursework in puns, but maybe they should. After all, if high school can teach kids a dead language, why not instruct them in a form of expression that’s alive and, moreover, quite frisky? We asked a handful of Latin teachers to comment on this state of affairs, but alas, they declined.

So, it seems that if you want to learn about puns, you have to learn by example. Fortunately for you, we have plenty of examples. A good place to start is this list of school puns for teachers, students, parents, and class clowns both past and present.

School puns, including puns about teachers, students, high school, elementary, etc.

Captions and Messages

Here are some puns you can employ in photo captions, social media posts, and other types of messages. If you’re a parent wondering what to write in a yearbook, you might also want to see this article.

  • Remember, no punning in the hall.
  • I’m super-intending to have a great school year.
  • I'm super-intending to have a great school year.

  • Feeling gym dandy.
  • I’m angling for an A in Geometry.
  • Always a class act.
  • Good principals have all their faculties intact.
  • Good principals have all their faculties intact.

  • Geography is world class.
  • I’ve got so much school spirit, it’s spooky.
  • Initially I was just a little nervous about English, but now I’m past tense.
  • Initially I was just a little nervous about English, but now I'm past tense.

  • [Debate Club] Debate club is de-great club!
  • [Chess Club] We’re playing it close to our chess.
  • [School Bus] Yellow, is it me you’re looking for?
  • [Winter] Looks like it’s time for snow and tell.
  • [Elementary School] It’s elementary, dear Watson!

Back to School Messages

Here are some punny back-to-school wishes you can send to a student. If you’re also sending goodies, you might want to check out these Skittles puns and our list of candy bar sayings.

  • Don’t let all those pop quizzes burst your bubble.
  • Don't let all those pop quizzes burst your bubble.

  • You’re so bright, your teachers will have to wear shades.
  • Hope nothing lessons your enthusiasm for going back to school.
  • I hope you find a group of friends who clique with you.
  • School starts this autumn – make sure you don’t fall behind.

Riddles

Finally, here are some jokes that feature clever school-related wordplay.

  • Why did everyone think the school dance was a joke?
    Because it had a big punch line!
  • Why did everyone think the school dance was a joke? Because it had a big punch line!

  • Did you know that students learned about baking in Home Economics?
    Yeah, the final assignment was a piece of cake!
  • How did the ophthalmology student decide which school to go to?
    He chose the one with the most pupils!
  • What does the cafeteria serve after school hours?
    After school specials!
  • If 55% of a farmer’s sheep are female and he has 200 sheep total, how many female sheep does he have?
    Ewe do the math!
  • If 55% of a farmer's sheep are female and he has 200 sheep total, how many female sheep does he have? Ewe do the math!

  • Did you hear about the teacher who almost got hit by a car?
    He was grading on a curve!
  • What do you call it when students read letters from their pen pals?
    A red letter day!
  • Why did the ghost hunter attend a pep rally at the local high school?
    He wanted to see their school spirit!
  • Did you hear that an arsonist burned down the high school?
    He used a high-lighter!
  • Did you hear that an arsonist burned down the high school? He used a high-lighter!

  • Who’s the most dishonest member of the school faculty?
    The lie-brarian, of course!
  • Why did the A student get so lonely?
    Because she was in a class by herself!
  • Did you hear that someone fainted in class?
    Yep, she went down in history!
  • Did you hear that someone fainted in class? Yep, she went down in history!

  • How can students avoid putting all their eggs in one basket?
    By participating in lots of eggs-tracurricular activities!

Now your assignment is to go make up your own puns about school. Or, if you’re not up to that, move on to these hokey homecoming puns.

Mat Jobe